I think its wonderful when you
find someone who truly enhances your life and you fall head over heels in love
with. That feeling of knowing you have found someone who you want in your life
forever and have such a wonderful connection with is what most of us are
striving for. We all want to be loved and appreciated and have someone to build
a wonderful life with.
Now logically I have to say that
I am absolutely blown away with the new concept of mutual facebook pages.
Where has the individuality gone? Now you are no longer your own person but
just a part of someone else? This may offend many and I truly congratulate you
for your success. Success is different for many people and by all means, if
changing your relationship status and becoming a "whole" by being
with someone else is your equivalent of success, then be my guest. I am no
better than anyone else and do not claim to be... My ideas of success may be
very different than others and I do not choose to live by others standards.
"Why wouldn't you want to
have a mutual page together with the love of your life and no matter what storm
you will weather it together?" I ask myself. Look at society, we as women
have become so socialized to believe that marriage is a must and sign of
success. A huge celebration is thrown in honor of a bride; who must get the
most elaborate dress, the most sparkling expensive ring and brag to all her
friends of how she has finally settled down with the man of her dreams and this
will be the happiest day of her life. It appears as showing off a trophy that
you finally convinced one of the better male species to commit to your desires
to live happily ever after.
So what happens when the honey
moon stay wears off? When bills come in, reality sets in and the gloss comes off
the finish? Is happily ever after really having him taking over your bathroom
in the morning (because of last night’s taco bell) when you need to prep for
work? Does happily ever after consist of doing their dirty laundry with a smile
after working all day and putting a gourmet dinner on the table? Sometimes you
take the good with the bad, sure I can accept that.
However this idealistic idea of
romance somehow fizzles with time. Sure you will enjoy their company and the
person will still bring butterflies to your stomach (in good and bad ways) and
give you that happiness you desire with someone. There will be times when you
will disagree. This happens with anyone. It can occur in daily life with friends,
family, lovers, etc. What happens when that occurs? You have now invested all
your energy into one person and have no one to vent to.
So you go on your facebook page
to vent or get advice and NOPE- sorry you have one page together. The instant
you email a friend to tell them your predicament you have just stirred up a whole
new problem. Consider if something tragic happens and gosh forbid things don't
work out (of course you already know it will) then what do you do? You have
lost your independence and are solely dependent on someone to complete you...
How will you go on?
I feel like as a couple you
should both have something to bring to the table. The idea of a relationship
should be to enhance each other’s life, not own it. When all is said and done,
you are your own person with your own ideas and values. Sure your mate may
share many of these but there may be some variations of disagreements along the
way. I tell you as an individual... Do not lose yourself along the way.
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